I DO NOT OWN NOR HAVE I CREATED ANY OF THE CHARACTERS IN THIS FANFIC, It’s just my own personal Story about one of my favorite cartoon shows; Ed, Edd and Eddy. I’d like to appreciate Steven Ricketts for allowing me the opportunity to present this story starring mine and everyone else’s favorite cartoon skunkette, Fifi Lafume! Okay now that I got that over with, enjoy the story!

 

Ed Edd and Eddy© A.k.A cartoon/ Cartoon Network.

All Tiny Toons Characters© W.B.

 

Fifi’s Ed-Venture

By Trajan the Terrapin

Part 1

 

“ED! EDD and EDDY!”

 

(ED, EDD and EDDY theme song plays)

 

ED! EDD! EDDY!

 

SCENE FADES  IN: Cul-de-sac:

 

It was a bright, Sunny Day at the Peach creek Town homes. All of the children were playing in the cul- de- sac as usual. The Ed’s However were inside Eds Basement pondering their next scheme…

 

Edd is working on his next experiment under a tarp inside Ed’s room, Both Ed and Eddy wait to see what’s underneath.

 

Edd (torquing a bolt): That should do it!

 

Eddy: Is it ready yet? Comon, we’ve got pigeons to swindle!

 

Ed: It‘ll be outta this world, Eddy!

 

Edd: Patience, my friends! Okay without further Ado, here is my latest invention!

 

Edd unravels the tarp to reveal the Thing a majig!

 

Eddy: That’s IT! We’ve already done that before! And it got ruined thanks to Johnny! Thanks for nothing, Double D!

 

Ed: Cool spout!

 

Edd: All my blood sweat and tears went into this project; Well worth the wait isn’t it?

 

Eddy: Yeah worth wasting my time!

 

Ed: Oh boy!

 

Edd: Be ungrateful if you must, Eddy; but this one is quite different from the last time; it’s been heavily modified to produce Jawbreakers of any flavor! Observe.

 

Edd puts an orange inside of the thing-a- majigs newly added spout, activates the switch and it produces a giant orange jawbreaker!

 

Ed and Eddy drop their jaws in disbelief at what they see…

 

Edd: Yes my friends, we can make jawbreakers; no longer will we have to pawn the kids with useless schemes….

 

Eddy (salivating): We Can MAKE Jawbreakers?!

 

Ed:  A JAWBREAKER!

 

Eddy runs over to grab the jawbreaker out of Edd’s hands.

 

Eddy (drooling): Well, don’t Mind if I do!

 

Just as he’s about to devour it, Ed snatches the sphere away from Eddy’s hand.

CHOMP! “OUCH!!” (Eddy obviously bit his own hand)

 

Ed: I love Jawbreakers, Double D!

 

Eddy (irritated): I bet you love PAIN too, Fur head!

 

Edd grabs the Jawbreaker from Ed’s grasp.

 

Ed: Gentlemen, Please! There will be plenty of jawbreakers for everyone once further testing is done!

 

Eddy: So all you gotta do is add fruit and it’ll turn it into one of these babies? SWEET! We can sell these to the kids for Ultra Cash! Were gonna be swimming in cash boys! Just think of all flavors we’ll have!

 

Ed: Flavors;Ooh Ooh, I know!

 

Edd grabs the Thing a majig and runs into his bathroom towards his gravy tub. He grabs out the ladle and pours a heaping spoonful of gravy into the spout!

 

Ed: How about a gravy flavored Jawbreaker, guys!

 

Edd/Eddy: ED, NOOOO!!

 

The thing-a-majigs circuitry struggles to identify the granules and extracts of the putrid gravy causing it to malfunction madly!

 

Edd(slapping his forehead): No, No! It wasn’t meant for gravy at all!

 

KABLAM!!!

 

Piles of gravy and debris everywhere surround the Eds.

 

Ed: Um ooops! Sorry guys!

 

Eddy: My experiment!

 

Eddy: All the possibilities…… This was the best scam ever! Ed you Idiot! Why I outta…

 

Sarah (peeping into Ed’s room): HEY! KEEP IT DOWN YOU IDIOTS! Me and Jimmy are in the middle of a my pretty pony movie!

 

Sarah slams the door. Edd starts gathering the pieces of his invention.

 

Edd: She’s right, Eddy; there’s no need to be tempermental. I can fix the Thing a majig; thankfully I’ve saved the blueprints over at my house. I should have another one built in no time!

 

Eddy: Way to go Double D! Always the brains of the operation!

 

Edd: Okay guys, see me within a couple of hours and then we’ll fulfill our scheme.

 

Eddy: 2 hours! What are we supposed to do until then?

 

Ed: Oh I know, How about counting every time the one eyed monster chews his victims in to mush from the Space Kidney Movie: ATTACK OF THE MUTANT ARTERIES!!: The sequel! With extra bonus footage!

 

Edd and Eddy look at Ed strangely.

 

Ed: Yeah. Just find something constructive to do and then come to my home at exactly 3:00pm, Okay!

 

Eddy: Ahhhh! This bites, I’m going home! I wonder what’s on TV?

 

Ed (hops onto eddy’s back): Hey Eddy Can I come along?

 

Eddy: GET LOST!

 

Eddy tosses Ed into a brick wall!

 

Ed: Ow; Pain and Hurt!

 

Scene Fade out

 

/2 hours later/

 

Fade in: Double D’s Bedroom; Ed and Eddy are outside the hallway waiting.

 

Eddy: Man this is gonna be so cool! Making jawbreakers selling them, eating them, oh the suspense is killing me!

 

Ed: You and me both, Eddy!

 

Eddy: Yeah Monobrow; Just don’t touch anything this time!

 

The door slowly opens to show a dissatisfied Double D.

 

Ed: Hmm, Double D looks broken, Eddy.  I think a zombie has eaten his brain!

 

Eddy: How big is your brain exactly, Ed? All right, Double D is it ready yet? Did ya fix it? Comon quit holdin out on us!

 

Edd: Well my friends it didn’t turn out to well, the circuitry had to be rewired and the fulcrum created form the forces of the turbine engine weren’t as fast as before and….

 

Eddy: Yak, Yak, Yak! Spill it already!

 

Edd: Patience, Eddy! The good news is, it’s fixed. The bad news is I require one more piece for it to be fully operational again.

 

Eddy: What is it? What do we need? Just tell us and well get it for you!

 

Edd: A portable circuit breaker.

 

Eddy: Where are we supposed to get one of those from!

 

Edd goes over to his file cabinets and looks up a map of a coastal city 30 miles from the Peach creak town homes. ACME ACRES! He places it on a table so all the Eds can see.

 

Eddy: So what is this place, Sock head?

 

Edd: This is where I ordered my parts from my pen pal to rebuild the thing a majig, guys! As Soon I have that piece of circuitry the sooner we get our plan underway!

 

Eddy: So that’s it? Oh Ed?

 

Ed: UH, Yes Eddy?

 

Eddy: Guess where you’re going today!

 

Ed: The Sci- Fi channel convention!

 

Eddy: No! Your gonna go and get this part for us so we can finish this scam!

 

Ed: Aww common, Eddy; the Space monster Movie Marathon starts in an hour!

 

Eddy: Don’t worry we’ll tape it for ya!

 

Edd: I’ll make arrangements so that I’ll have him meet you at the recreational park in the City.

 

(Double D text messages his friend with his PDA phone. Nice!)

 

Scene fades out:

 

FADE IN: BUS STOP

 

Edd is gives Ed a map, a compass, and a picture of the circuit breaker not to mention 10 dollars; and the transfers for the bus of course!

 

Eddy: All that money we made off that breakfast eatery scam; GONE! This better be worth it, Sock head; money doesn’t grow on trees ya know!

 

Edd: Silence Eddy! Okay Ed here’s the gist of your quest; all you have to do is meet my friend here in this park area… ED are you listening? Anyways, retrieve the circuit breaker from him. And if you have time, do some sightseeing if you wish. Then come back. Okay!

 

Ed: Oke- Dokey, Double D!

 

Eddy: Don’t mess this up, Fur head were counting on you!

 

Rolf is seen in his urban ranger uniform walking along with his pig, Wilfred. He stops momentarily to see the Eds at the bus stop.

 

Rolf: Good day, ED- boys! How goes the candied sphere hunt?

 

Edd: Hello Rolf; and how are you doing, Wilfred?

 

Eddy: Oh great, an Urban Loser! We’ll be rolling in Cash once Ed comes back from this city called Ant Acres or something like that!

 

Rolf: Oh ho ho! SO the bird brained Ed- boy is going on a quest to uncharted territory, yes? I should give him something for good luck!

 

The bus comes in and parks next to the stop; the doors open and Ed starts to board.

 

Rolf: ED- BOY Wait!  There is something I must give to you!

 

Ed: Cool, is it a model space rocket form the brain slug planet TV series!

 

Rolf: No, sponge for brain Ed-boy! Rolf has the feeling you’ll be making a new friend today.

 

Rolf hands ED a Bright, Yellow Chrysanthemum. Edd observes studying the flower with magnifying glass

 

Edd: My, what a fine specimen of Chrysanthemum cinerariaefolium!

 

Rolf: Ahh yes, this sacred plant was given to me by my Great nana for good fortune!

 

Eddy: Yeah that is kinda neat, Rolf. Hey Lets sell it for cash; I’ll bet we can make some moola off of this…

 

Rolf hits eddy in the back of the head!

 

Rolf: No, Nincompoop! Why money corrupts your brain constantly I do not know; protect the Sacred Plant, Ed-Boy!

 

Ed: Cool!

 

Ed places it inside of his pocket. How it’ll survive knowing that guys filth I don’t know.

 

Eddy: Okay times-a wastin off ya go Monbrow!

 

Eddy shoves Ed inside, the door closes. The bus speeds off to Acme Acres; Ed waves’ to his two friends.

 

Edd: Have a safe journey, Ed! Don’t take too long!

 

Eddy: And don’t come back without that part!

 

Rolf: Farewell, Ed- boy! (One less ed-boy around here is a vacation within itself right, Wilfred?)

 

(Wilfred squeals)

 

ACME ACRES PARK

 

“ Whoaaa....UMMMHP! (ha ha ha)” Ed clumsily falls off the bus onto the sidewalk; The bus driver shakes his head at the boy then drives off. Ed gets up off the sidewalk and pulls out the map Double D gave him.

 

Edd reads a sticky note with directions left on the map by Edd.

 

Ed: Okay let’s see now umm….. ‘Follow the trial leading to the water fountain; and you will see the blue coyote waiting to make the purchase.’ That is all? Your wish is my lunch, Double D!

 

Ed puts the map away and runs into the park; Meanwhile 3 familiar toons were walking out of an Ice cream parlor down the street. Fifi La fume is seen in her green dress walking with her friends Babs Bunny and Shirley the loon towards the park!

 

Fifi(teary eyed): Le soi-disant poseur!

 

Babs: Aww Come on, Fifi don’t be so bummed out because Johnny Stinker stood you up!

 

Shirley: Yeah like, you’re a better person than that uptight jerk!

 

Fifi: I suppose your right, girls. (Le sigh) when we’ll I evair find true love?

 

Shirley: Like, cheer up, Feef! Maybe a walk in the park will do you good or some junk!

 

Babs: Yeah, I agree!

 

All 3 girls walk to the park entrance, Meanwhile Ed encounters Calamity coyote!

 

Ed: Hello little doggy!

 

Calamity writes out a series of signs: “I’m no canine! I’m a higly intelligent coyote!”

 

“Edd told me you were arriving to make a purchase, right?”

 

Ed grabs the blue coyote and hugs him tightly.

 

Ed: What a soft and cuddily, little doggy you are!

 

Calamity struggles to breathe from Eds strong grip!

 

Across from the park, the girls approach the fountain….

 

Fifi: Eet ees a nice day outside, Non?

 

Babs: We should’ve like gone to the beach instead.

 

Shirley: Yeah, for sure!

 

Fifi: Oui, but were here anyways! Hey look, girls! Ovair there; Eeesent that Calamity?

 

All 3 see the bumbling oaf with the blue coyote.

 

Babs: Yeah it is him; who’s that other guy?

 

Shirley: Let’s go check it out!

 

Back to Ed and Calamity….

 

Calamity pries himself from Ed’s strong grip and writes out another series of signs…

 

“I’m not a dog, you Imbecile! Man, you’re dumber than Elmyra!”

 

“Now here’s the circuit breaker you need!”

 

Ed: The Circuit Breaker! How can I reward you; Oh I know, you must be hungry little doggy, Here is a treat for you!

 

Ed hands calamity a 3 week old dog biscuit covered in slime and fungus. Calamity falls back quite sickened from the deformed treat.

 

Ed: Aww come on just take one bite!

 

“No way, hose!”

 

Ed starts to chase Calamity around the park with the rotten treat.

 

The girls oversee everything from a bush next to the fountain…

 

Babs: Ehh, nothing new; Calamities got himself into another problem again.

 

Shirley: Yeah like, I feel sorry for him.

 

Babs: This is boring, girls come on let’s go to the mall.

 

Shirley: Yeah; coming along, Feef, uhh Fifi!

 

Fifi’s eyes have turned  heart shaped and has an ear to ear smile on her face!

 

Babs: Oh no, she’s got that look again!

 

Shirley: Now Feef don’t get like, get all gung ho about this…

 

Fifi leaps out like a bolt of lightning towards the two!

 

Babs: Here we go again!

 

As Ed stops, exhausted from chasing Calamity, The purple skunkette grabs Ed Tightly around the waist!

 

Ed: Huh? Who’s there? * he looks down on his waist and sees Fifi waving at him* OH NO! A monster is trying to eat my body!

 

Fifi: No Mon ami; I am hugging vous! Eets a sign of friendship, Non?

 

Ed: A sign, where? I see no signs!

 

Fifi (giggling): You’re funnee!

 

Ed: Hey you’re kinda cute!

 

Fifi (blushing): Merci; you don’t look so bad yourself, Beeg boy!

 

Ed: Oh yeah uhh, I’m Ed.

 

Fifi (wrapping his tail around Ed): And I Am Fifi Lafume; what breengs you here to Acme Acres?

 

Ed (blushes): Ohh…umm uhh. Here ya go! Rolf said to give this to someone, I think.

 

He gives Her Rolf’s Golden Chrysanthemum! Fife’s Eyes light up when Ed hands her the flower!

 

Fifi: Aww you shouldn’t have! (It’s a bit wilted, but Eets zee that that counts, on?)

 

Fifi hugs Ed tightly with her tail!

 

Ed: You are so soft and cuddily!

 

Calamity oversees the couple hugging eachother, He rolls his eyes and walks away from them; shortly he encounters Babs and Shirley.

 

Babs: Hey what’s going on, Calamity?

 

Shirley: Yeah like, why was that dude chasing you for?

 

Calamity (holding out another sign): “He thought I was a dog! The Idiot.”

 

Babs: Oh I see, like Elmyra; where’d Fifi go?

 

Calamity: “Go see for yourself.”

 

He points over to where Ed and Fifi are seen sitting on a bench holding hands while gazing at eachother lovingly.

 

Babs: Well whadya know, Feefs found a new boyfriend!

 

Shirley: Yeah, I told her there’s plenty of fish in the sea out there; let’s go meet him!

 

The girls go over and Meet Fifis New boyfriend!

 

Babs: Hey Feef whose your new friend ….*sniff* *sniff*Oh man, what’s that smell?

 

Shirley: Yeah did someone like forget to shower today?

 

The girls obviously aren’t aware of Ed’s Hygiene problem….

 

Fifi: Hey girls, Zees are Ed! Ed; zees is Babs Bunny and Shirley Ze Loon, My ‘ow you say’ gal pals!

 

Ed: Hello! Wait; why are you wearing gas masks!

 

Babs/Shirley: Why don’t ya tell us?

 

Fifi: Girls do not be so rude! He doesn’t smell zat bad.

 

Babs: (That’s if you’re a skunk!) But  I’m glad to see you’ve found someone new!

 

Fifi: Oui! Hey Ed, Want to go ovair to ze Movies?

 

(looks at the compass as a watch)

 

Ed: Sure! I’ve got some time; plus 10 dollars Double D gave me!

 

Fifi: Well Girls, Me an Ed are going out now! Au -revuoir!

 

Babs: Fine by us feef. Later!

 

Shirley: Yeah, we’ll se ya later.

 

The young couple walks arm in arm to the movie theaters, and sees the horror film: Attack of the mutant arteries!: the sequel. Normally Fifi doesn’t like those kind of films but she saw it anyway just to appease her new boyfriend. (Every time there was a gruesome scene she grabbed Ed’s arm in fear!)

 

SCENE FADE IN- Acme dump- Nighttime:

 

After the movie Ed walked Fifi back to her Cadillac home in the Acme Dump...

 

Ed: You live in a car? Cool!

 

Fifi: Oui, eets my own private House, An ze best part ees; I don’t have to pay rent!

 

Ed: I’ve always wanted to live in rocket ship. Like that one we saw in the movie today!

 

Fifi :( quivering)….yes…lets not talk about zat movie, Mon ami. Eet scared me out of my mind! (Next time I’ll pick ze film).

 

Ed: Oh I’m sorry, Feefy! I love science Fiction, horror movies.

 

Fifi: Eets okay, Ed, It was a new experience for me! (An experience zat I’ll NEVAIR have again!)*yawn* Eets ‘ow you say’ getting late I’ve got to get up early for school tomorrow!

 

Ed looks at the compass again as a watch. The needle is spinning around wildly

 

Ed: Umm, My watch is broken Fifi; for I cannot tell time!

 

Fifi looks at the Compass Eds holds and chuckles slightly.

 

Fifi: Zees ees no watch dearie; eets a compass, All of ze metal around here eets  useless!

 

Ed: Oh that’s what it is!

 

Fifi: By ze way, eets 10:30.

 

Ed:  10:30 Oh no! I gotta get home or else my mom will kill me; I gotta go Fifi see ya later!

 

Fifi: Ed wait!

 

The oaf stops in his tracks. Fifi walks up to Ed.

 

Fifi: Can I see you again Aftair School tomorrow? I had a great time today weeth you; thanks to you I’ve forgotten all about zat othair skunk-unk!

 

 

Ed: Yeah I’ll come back! I’ll see if my pals will come with me this time!

 

Fifi: Sounds great, I would love to meet Zhem! What are zhere names?


Ed: Edd and Eddy, We call Edd double D. Well I gotta Go, Fifi; I’ll see you tomorrow!

 

Fifi hugs Ed tightly again and wraps her tail around him like a snake.

 

Fifi: Au revoir Mon petit potato du couch! I’ll see you tomorrow.

 

She kisses him passionately on the lips; Ed laughs slightly.

 

Ed: Goodbye my little bundle of love and caring!

 

SCENE FADE OUT-

FADE IN: Street corner next to the bustop.

 

Ed runs back towards the bus stop where He arrived earlier today with the transfer in his hand; He sees a bus leaving as he approaches…

 

Ed:  Wait for Me Mr. Bus driver! I gotta transfer right here in my UMMPH! (He runs into the back of the bus in typical ed- fashion)

 

Ed boards the bus back to Peach creek.

 

End of Part 1: Sorry I gotta end it like this but College is more important! Part 2’s coming soon you guys!

 

Fake voice cast:

 

Fifi: Kath Soucie

Babs: Tress Macneille

Shirley: Gail Matthius

Ed: Matt Hill

Edd: Samuel Vincent

Eddy: Tony Sampson

Rolf: Peter Kalamis

Sarah: Janyse Jaud